How to Be More Confident

We should all celebrate the way we look, says Alison Sweeney, yet that's sometimes easier said than done. Follow her wise advice to feel great about yourself inside and out.

From Redbook

Like a lot of women I often connect how I feel about my body to how I feel about myself as a person. I'll think that if I stick to a diet and lose weight, I'll become a better actress, wife, and mother. I have to remind myself that that's not healthy or rational; I experience ups and downs in my personal and work life no matter what my body size is. I don't want my daughter to pin so much on how she looks, so I don't point out my flaws or talk about dieting. I hope my actions help her love her own body; I know they're part of how I care for mine. So here's a challenge: Instead of dwelling on the parts you want to change, remind yourself of all the ways you are already amazing. It's the first step toward making healthier decisions. Body confidence isn't a thing you have or you don't—you can build it.

Instead of: "This swimsuit makes me look fat"

SAY THIS: "My legs are strong"

I always used to make jokes about my body at the beach. I would point out that I hadn't been to the gym in a while and cover up with a towel. Eventually I realized that no one else cared how I looked and I was missing out on all the fun. If you're not happy about your shape, take time tomorrow to set up a workout plan—but don't focus on these negative thoughts today. Instead, appreciate how your legs let you chase your kids in the sand and your arms help you launch that volleyball clear over that net.

Instead of: "I wish I looked more like…"

SAY THIS: "I'm so lucky to have my…"

There are bits of inspiration you can take from friends or celebrities, like a fitness routine, a recipe, or a beauty trick. But the thing I try to keep in mind when I wish I could be more like someone else is that they don't have all the good things I do. Sure, they might have the time to work out with a trainer every morning, but they don't get to wake up to my wonderful husband or have breakfast with my kids—and I wouldn't give that up for hard abs any day. Remind yourself of what you have, and other people's looks won't matter as much.

Instead of: "It's too late for me to make a change"

SAY THIS: "Yes, I can"

The fear of not achieving our goals is exactly what prevents us from taking the first step. Yes, you can eat heathier, you can learn to cook, and you can quit smoking. I have probably made 1,000 excuses over the course of my adult life, but once I started picking goals that were realistic for me—to drink one less soda a day, or take a short walk during lunch—I found that, yes, I could make healthy changes and stick with them. If you set small goals, you can realize them.

Instead of: "I need to go on a diet"

SAY THIS: "I feel better when I eat well and work out"

This will help you look at getting healthy as a reward, not a punishment. By eating better, I am choosing to have more energy during the day and to sleep better at night. Sometimes I choose to have a glass of wine to wind down from a long day—and that's great too! A diet shouldn't be about depriving yourself; eating well is about choosing to enjoy life more fully.
how to build confidence, how to gain confidence



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U.S. Daily News: How to Be More Confident
How to Be More Confident
U.S. Daily News
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